What to Teach Your Kids about Marriage in a World that Doesn’t Get It

Remember the wedding scene in the movie Princess Bride, when the priest with the speech impediment waxes eloquent about “Mauwage?”

Much is being tossed about on the subject these days. I’m not sure if “mauwage” has ever been more misunderstood or devalued than it is today.

Your children are facing a world that’s considerably different than it was even a generation ago.

In our culture, even for those who see themselves as believers, it’s considered okay for couples to simply co-habitate or co-parent.

Since marriage is viewed as an optional commitment between two people who love each other, it’s also considered okay if those two people are the same gender.

With this view of marriage in place, what’s to stop two bisexual people from “marrying,” but also bringing opposite-sex relationships into the “family” so that everyone can swing the bat both ways?

Here’s the thing: Gender confusion is rooted in spiritual confusion.

As John Stonestreet of the Colson Center for Christian Worldview explains, historically, people believed that humans are primarily metaphysical beings whose sexual behavior flows out of their spiritual beliefs.

Nowadays, we believe man is primarily a sexual being, and the spiritual part of humans must bow to the sexual. See the difference?

This is more than a moral slide downhill. It’s a radical paradigm shift.

The good news is, in every age and in every culture, the truth of the gospel supersedes what culture dictates.

Take heart!  When it comes to raising wholehearted followers of Jesus in an anti-gospel culture, countless others have gone before you. You are in good company.

So how can you establish God’s truth about marriage in your children’s hearts and minds?

1. Make your own marriage a priority. Include regular date nights in your life. Honor your spouse in word and deed. Be affectionate in front of the kids. Keep your relationship fresh and alive.
2. Read good books on marriage. Tim Keller’s The Meaning of Marriage, Matt Chandler’s The Mingling of Souls, and Glenn Stanton’s The Ring Makes All the Difference are a few examples of books that will help you articulate what marriage is for and why it’s so important.
3. Talk it up. Make it a point to counteract the lies your children hear about marriage on a daily basis. Show them in Scripture what God says about it. Teach them that we serve a covenant-keeping God, and that marriage is a covenant before him.
4. Use visual displays to reinforce what you teach. I’m planning on creating a “wedding wall” in my house, where I’ll display wedding photos of our parents’ weddings, our own wedding, and each of our sons’ weddings. I’ll show this legacy to the grandkids when they visit. I’ll talk about the beauty of marriage as God designed and ordained it.
5. Make a big deal out of anniversaries. Even very young children can understand that their parents have a unique relationship — in fact, they gain a great deal of security from it. As they get old enough, teach your children to honor your anniversary in some way, even if it’s with a simple home-made card.

Scott and I reached our 33^rd wedding anniversary last Sunday. Our many sweet memories include coming home from special evenings and hearing our young sons ask, “How was dinner?”

(One year, they cooked for us, and I donned my wedding gown for the event!)

Don’t take this cultural shift lying down. Teach your children the value and importance of marriage.

No one can influence them like you can.